Yeah..About that last post O.O! Just forget about it. It's not so much as being "done and over with" but it's that I'm in the situation where nothing can be done. Someone is unfair. Someone is playing favorites. Someone else is getting hurt. That someone is a person who knows better. Someone who should be caring and loving. That someone else is a 3 year old that I can see that is being emotionally hurt. I tried to step in. I had my say. I need to make sure that I am here to maintain the peace without anyone else knowing what is happening behind the scenes..

Well on a better note, I think I'm going to give a mini update!!!

I decided to change my speculated career to a taxidermist.
Don't you hate it when no matter what you want to be or do - It's always the wrong thing?
When I want to be a computer programmer, I needed to be a business person!
When I want to be a vet, I needed to be a nurse.
When I want to be a taxidermist, I need to stick "with what I know", that being computers; a computer programmer.

Oh well. I really like the idea of what I want to do. It seems like an exciting career.

I get told by certain family members - You need to have a job that pays VERY good. You can, hypothetically speaking, buy happiness.
*slaps head* SO wrong.
So if I like computers, I get paid well...I won't enjoy my job. But I'll make money! I can come home and do whatever I want to do after those harsh 8 hours.
Now, I currently don't have a real job - but I have. Sure, you can clock in some time as being a waitress, clock out and do whatever your life bids you to do.

Imagine now, being a white collar programmer. A person who is constantly working on a project. Either alone, or in a group. Now, I've got this big project here - I'm sitting in my cubicle all damned day, wondering how I can make it better, how I can fix that error, how I can avoid that loop. Am I going to take these thoughts with me?? HELL YES. Computers you can't avoid. It's not an "out of sight, out of mind" job. I come home and I can sit on the computer. I can be miserable at home too.

I love computers, don't get me wrong here. I can program some stuff on them. I can build them. If I don't know it, I'm eager to learn.

I'm sorry my dearest brother, money and material items may make you happy - but money definitely cannot buy me happiness.

If I can pay the bills, put some food in my mouth, have a roof over my head and enjoy my day overall - I'm a happy person. I don't live to be miserable. I would have offed myself a long time ago if I couldn't enjoy at least one day in my life. I feel almost as if that was where I was heading with my career of choice. I hear it every day, "Oh, programmer jobs are going overseas" So I could have done databasing or something else. It was still something that I'd inevitably take home with me mentally and physically. I'd be worn out.

Hell, I love being creative. I don't have much of a knack for drawing, but I do it once in a blue moon. I love to sew, but I get caught up in homework. I try to find some little way here or there to do some sort of craft. I like working with more organic-like materials. I feel like, with Taxidermy, I can do my job with mounting things and what not. And if I wanted to take it home, turn scraps into crafts, or just do something for myself - I can do that. I'd be content. I can explore new things to do - That's what creativity really is. It's an expansion of your self. Turning dreams into reality. Breathing life into death.

Overall....It's something that I could see myself doing happily.

On another note, I have 2 essays, 7 tests, 5 chapters to read, and I still feel the need to procrastinate!! YAY!